I Was Just Thinking….

I Was Just Thinking

This is going to be a very specific generalized posting….you see, I had this moment of thought this morning, just moments ago and I as I expressed it, it felt good, it felt real, and I realized it was and is something I want to say. So I thought, not say it. See where it takes me. And that is my intent and my intent leads to this posting.

There are things I haven’t seen that I want to see. There are places I haven’t been that I want to go. There are people I haven’t met that I want to meet. There is life I haven’t lived that I want to live. There are wishes I haven’t wished and dreams I haven’t dreamed.

Most everyone can say this I expect. But, I’m not most everyone because at this moment it is very personable to me….very intimate.  I’m getting older. Yeah, we all are.  But, there’s a reality of a finish line that is set before me and each day, each moment I’m getting closer………and as we age and I’ve known this particularly since I’ve entered my 60’s that it’s more real.  Imminent! Perhaps I’m a bit sentimental, or better yet remorseful. Yeah, remorseful that I haven’t done what I could have done. I’ve lost out on a lifetime of experience. I’ve left a path uncluttered, no remnants of my life for exhibit. HA!!!  Proof of life!!!

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I do have what’s left in front of me, which may be only….today.

I have allowed others to direct my path and that path…….isn’t near what I want or wanted. Are they to blame.  No!!!  Absolutely not!  Ultimately it was my choice.

So now what???

I can’t do anything about the past, I can only do about the now, that shapes my future. I have an aggressiveness from going thru this….”I Was Just Thinking” progress.

I am gauging my words carefully, basic them on my thoughts regarding my statement of unfinished living and purposing to do.  Because, this can’t be just a writing exercise, this is a reality shaping moment.

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I’ve decided to put my generalizations mentioned in the second paragraph in writing that stays with me, the reason why they are unfinished, the attitude I have towards that, and have an open and willing mind and attitude to the creative means to accomplish them. Each moment and each breath edges me closer to the finish line at which time, everything is left behind.

Mentally, my bags are packed, I envision the faceless faces I will encounter, I sense the exhilaration of adventures that beckon……I’m on my way. While still fighting the obstacles that continually make known their presence.  I move forward.

I was just thinking.  I have a feeling you haven’t heard the last of this!

Peace, Love, and Beaches,

John

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